Friday, February 8, 2013


Okay, you guys ready? Let's kick off the 3rd day of BBF with an interview with horror writer, Will Millar. 

Here's the preview: Hedge trimmers, electronic-toothbrush orgasms, Han Solo, and eyeball gouging. Enjoy.

"Hi, Will!"


"Down to it."

1. What’s your favorite scary movie?

That’s a hard one to answer, and it varies greatly, depending on my mood. Today I’d say Suspiria, but I might have a different answer tomorrow. 

2. Do you own a chainsaw? Do you know how to use it?

No, but I own an electric hedge trimmer. It looks sort of like a chainsaw if you squint your eyes a little, stand really far back and try to ignore the bright orange extension cord. When you turn it on it makes this really high pitched humming sound that probably isn’t going to instill terror in anybody, either.

3. If you had to kill someone, how would you do it, and where would you bury the body?

It depends on the person – Do they deserve to die? I’d probably get pretty squeamish about the deal unless they were a truly terrible person, like a despot or a pop music producer. Then, if that was the case, I’d have to go with my patented semi-automatic laser guided porcupine cannon. As for burying the body, you can’t go wrong with a “purloined letter” approach. Buy one of those life sized Han Solo Carbonite slabs, hollow the sucker out, stuff your dead body in there and then display it proudly on your front lawn.

4. If you could meet one fictional horror character (from a book or movie), who would it be and why? What would you ask them?

I’d ask Dawn O’Keefe if she ever had an orgasm from an electronic toothbrush.

5. You’re driving through a forest at night. A woman leaps out through the trees and frantically waves her arms for you to stop the car. She’s covered in blood. Do you stop?

It’s okay to do one of those sliding roll-stops. People screw up when they get out of the car and say something dumb like “My God! Are you alright? What happened?” That’s how you get your head cut off. Just pop the passenger door open long enough for her to hop in and then hammer the gas like a motherfucker. And whatever you do, never say “Everything is going to be okay now.” Or even worse, “You’re safe.”

6. What are you most scared of? And you lose a limb if you say clowns, spiders, or heights.

I’m afraid of randomly losing limbs during interviews.

7. I had a British woman say to me once that she thinks it best to stay away from horror writers because there must be something wrong with them. Weigh in.

It sounds to me like she was trying to flirt with you. 

8. Favorite death in a horror movie?

Lucio Fulci’s done a couple of beauts. The eyeball gouging scene in Zombie is pretty gut-wrenching.

9. Have you ever hitchhiked? If yes, who picked you up?

I used to hitchhike all the time when I was younger. When I was in the Marine Corps, I could always count on catching a ride from the airport in Raleigh Durham to Camp Lejeune that way, and never had an issue. That being said, it’s not the sort of thing I would condone my kids doing, but that goes for a lot of the stuff I’ve done.

10. What’s your latest release? Describe it in one word, and give us that Amazon link already! 

My latest release is called Infernal Machines. If I have to describe it in one word, I’ll say “Firecracker.” 

Buy it on Amazon:

Thank you, Will, for stopping by! 


  1. How quick was Will's response to question 3? Do you think he's given this a lot of thought already?

    1. I know, right? Too bad it's all here now on the internet...